Real-Life Trolls

Surely, you must remember this thing called ‘real life’…
Real-Life Trolls! I just met one.

Last night, my wife and I went for a stroll, hoping to walk to that place where we have a wonderful view of the valleys and the stars.
But when we arrived there, turns out that they had started some construction work -more new houses! yay!- so the only way to access the end of the road is to go through the gate the fire department leaves there to prevent cars from blocking access.
Well, no biggie. Let’s open the gate…
That’s when my wife tells me that someone was approaching with their dog.
That dude yells quite abruptly: “You got any dog there?”. Well, no, we don’t, and that’s what I tell him.
He then opens the gate and walks his poodle through it, to the end of the road. Cool, let’s do that too since it’s the original plan.
The guys turns around and starts literally screaming at us: “What are you doing? Do NOT follow me in here!”
I guess I must have looked quite retarded, staring at him with a dumbfounded look on my face.
Since I’m that slow, the guy then feels the need to scream some more, that he wants to be alone with his dog, that’s why he walks her at night, we can wait for them to be gone and then we can steal whatever we want.
Of course, being the smart-witted fellow everyone around me has learnt to love and look up to, I retort: “Hey asswipe, I think you need to apologize now”.
The guy replies: “I’m sorry”.
Well, OK, I think; But Mary feels that it’s her turn to give him a piece of her mind. I push her away rather quickly, thinking that I’m happy that I didn’t get myself in some kind of situation where I end up having a long chat with a police officer.

Anyway, the similarities with a forum/irc troll are striking:
1. A troll shows up when you’ve been around for a while, which makes him a ‘newbie’
2. The troll opens his mouth right away, no need to analyze the current topic, which makes him a ‘n00b’
3. You bet your sweet bum that the troll is going to say something stupid, which makes him a troll
4. Not to mention throw accusations all around, which makes you want to kick him out
5. The troll is not in control of the situation at all -or his dog in this case.
6. And even your good members end up getting in a silly flame war with trolls -here: Mary.
7. If you play their game, you may end up being in trouble with the moderators yourself!